Courtney: An Obituary

Rest In Peace Courtney Loyal Servant

One is sad to announce that my butler, valet, personal assistant and chauffeur Courtney passed away recently.

One is saddened beyond description as the stinker owed me seven guineas from the gee-gees. That horse was a dead-cert even though it was 200/1. It's just that the other horses fell ill, one couldn't get out of the starting gate two of the others threw their riders leaving only my horse and 'Arse-biscuit' to finish the race.

It wasn't his job to evaluate whether the horse would win or not. All he had to do was to do as he was bloody well told. I didn't pay him to think!  Instead he put the money on that blasted nag 'Twenty Hotels' on 10/2. It was the bloody favourite wasn't it! naturally I'd fixed it so the blasted animal would fall at the first fence.

Lost that lolly because of him and he always refused to pay it back! What a ghastly little man he was. But you just can't get the staff any more these days and now I have to foot the bill for his funeral too!

Justin Beleiber, Believer, Beiber Bieber Whateber!

Silly Little Boy

What in God’s name is a Belieber? It sounds like someone who doesn't drink enough alcohol! Maybe that's an imbiber?

We'll anyway it is supposed to be something to do with a dreadful little child called Justin Beiber or is that Beleeiber, Biebier, belieber... whateiber. This little blighter is only about eight years old yet lots of adults like him, sounds like pedophile fodder if you ask me.

Drug Addict Photos: Before and After!!

Heroin Addict Before.............. After

Just been reading about heroin and the effect it has on those whom consume it.

Apparently the fools that take this stuff are off their bloody rockers! Don't have a clue what is going on and are not able to care either. Kind of envy them in a way!

Anyway they become so deluded that they rapidly decline in terms of mental health and become so addicted that everything in their lives revolves around the acquisition of money to buy heroin, Kind of envy them in a way.

Addict: Sulkin Before....... After

The result is that these people lose their jobs, homes, friends and acquaintances. After that they turn to criminal activity such as mugging people and fraud.

Frequently they end up in gaol at the tax payers expense! So we are still giving them handouts!! Don't know about you but I bloody well had to work other people to the bone to get where I am today so it is pretty galling when I see this lot being spoiled by being thrown in goal or rehabilitation centres when they could easily be placed on a pile of manure. When will it all end? 

Addict: Winehouse Before..... After

But the worst thing about it is that simply increases the number of ugly people patrolling the streets! Who do they think they are? One has attached a few photos to look at to compare these people how they were before taking drugs and what they were like after. Its a disgrace!

It is clear that what these people need is help, care and assistance for their condition. I recommend more make-up. Failing that they could just simply put a bag on their head? And preferably a plastic one at that.

SPWA and a Heavy Metal Concert

Heavy Metal Concert

One is not usually keen on modern musich but last night one went to a Heavy Metal Concert in London.

Got to say it was absolutely spiff-o. One watched the band for two hours belting out hit after hit of rollickingly thundering music bringing down the house all over the place

Famine in Africa

Just seen pictures on the telly about the latest famine in Africa. 

Can't believe that this sort of hoo-haa goes on in the 21st Century. Apparently hundreds of thousands of plebians are suffering needlessly because there just isn't enough food where they are. 

According to the W.H.O. this sort of thing goes on alot! And from looking at all the pictures on the telly I’m hardly surprised there’s a blasted famine there. I mean I didnt see a single bloody supermarket anywhere. Not even a corner shop or an ice cream van. No wonder they’re all starving hungry!

What's the matter with these people? If one wants to go on holiday one goes to a place where there is basic public facilities not a wide open field full of poor people! What in God's name are these people up to? 

Still, one has bought a van and is sending it there to churn out a few kebabs, with that lot going hungry I can charge whatever I like. One is going to make a killing