Saturday, 31 August 2013

Seamus Heaney: An Obituary and Tribute

Rusty Bike
One has just heard about the death of an Irish poet called Seamus Heaney. Poets are very nice and all that sort of thing but poetry is very easy don cha know so I can't see what all the fuss is about.

Anyway, one realises that Seamus Heanous was a very popular poet and influcenced many people with his literary witticisms and ability to make things rhyme. But ultimately this is all a load of overblown fuss, storm in a teacup and all that.

Nevertheless, occasions like these warrant some kind of dedication to the man for providing much happiness to people especially his literary agent who made a fortune promoting Seamus' work.

So to that end I thought I would throw my lot in and pen a poetic ditty to the man, to not only encapsulate the essence of his life but to try to evoke the passion and spirit that he conveyed as he

Wednesday, 28 August 2013

Badger Cull in England

Cull: Another One Bites the Dust
Just been reading all the hoo-haa surrounding  the government cull that started just a few days ago.

The cull itself is for the purposes of preventing the spread of T.B. in cattle and maybe a few other dreadful little nasties throughout the rest of the countryside.

The disease T.B. is an airborne one and cattle catch it simply by breathing in the bacteria. Once they have got it they suffer a slow and agonising death and it is only in the best interests of the beasties if the farmer puts a bullet through their heads! 

Culling the disease by killing its host carrier, claim farmers,

Tuesday, 20 August 2013

NSA, Prism, Edward Snowden and Jennifer Aniston

Just been reading about the complete farce of the PRISM scandal over in the United States of America. Apparently the boffins in charge over there are so paranoid about security issues and people trying to attack the place that they felt it would be a good idea to start eavesdropping on what people were saying to each other and that includes Miss Jennifer Aniston.

There was a small problem though, the  N.S.A. had,  (National Security Agency is a body designated by former President George W.C. Bush to protect the American people including Miss Jennifer Aniston  from a handful of loons on the other side of the planet who have killed less American people than Americans that die from Obesity related issues per month) They didn't know precisely whom to monitor. So with the help of several projects called PRISM,

Sunday, 18 August 2013

Sasquatch? Bigfoot? Big-shit more like!

Just look at this video just take a look at it. It's by a chappie called M.K.Davis from the former colonies. In essence it is an analysis of a piece of footage taken in 1967 by two men called Roger Patterson and Robert Gimlin. These two fellows claim that the footage is of a legendary creature that the locals call Bigfoot or Sasquatch.

This creature has large burly muscles, walks around with no clothes on, smells completely foul,  lives in caves or under sticks, walks around in the forests all day and doesn't speak very good English.

According to scientists the creature is purely a legend but one has to say this is not true as one has personally shot and killed

Friday, 16 August 2013

Anti-LGBT laws in Russia

LGBT acts banned from Restaurants
Having been force-fed LGBT matters down one's throat over the last 20 years one feels that one should bally-well write something about it.  One is in favour of equality and all that sort of thing but recent events in Russia have caused uproar around the world.

Personally, one thinks that the Russians are taking this matter all the wrong way and that their legislature and President Mr Vladimir Putin have a lot to answer for!

For example, it is now illegal for people under the age of 18 years to see material concerning LGBT issues. Furthermore, it is an offence for anyone under 21 to partake in LGBT acts! The country has gone back to the Stalin era! It's a disgrace

I mean  why youngsters should be prevented from this sort of activity in the school dining room is completely beyond me? Also they are prevented from reading and partaking in this sort of thing in public restaurants too! What kind of a society do they have there? 

Wednesday, 14 August 2013


Seems to me that the latest hullabaloo the press have got their claws into is cyber-bullying!

Well despite the press being a motley collection of arses they appear to have got something right for a change.

Cyber-bullying is a modern phenomenon whereby a youngster connects to a social web site of some description and converses with complete strangers. The strangers, after offering endless platitudes to their victim, then start to hurl abusive comments and suggestions to their victim that they should consider ending their own lives. 

This is pitiful! Just what in God's name is wrong with these people?  They are an absolute shower. One can scarcely contain one's disgust at this outrage! I have only one thing to say to these people! Bloody well stand up for yourselves!

If you are going to end it all just because some bufoon calls you an oik then you might as well go and hang yourself!! The damn lot of you. You're probably ugly as well and your mummy shits in plastic supermarket bags. If you people weren't so damn obese you would be able to get out of the blasted bedroom and go out and do a bit of exercise instead of lounging around on your great arses wallowing in your own blubber.

As I see it the best way to put an end to cyber bullying is for you weaklings to go outside, find a nice quiet spot in a forest and then put a bullet through you head. Hell is waiting for you you ugly, B.O. ridden, incontinent, bedragglehorn. If you're too much of a coward to do it yourself then send me your details and I'll send the boys round to ....


Friday, 9 August 2013

Adele: Not a Fat Cow!

Not Half a Ton
Just been reading about a popular singer called Adele. Aside from the fact that she also has here own brand of personal computers she apparently also has a very good singing voice. Now this is all tickety-boo but the media, as usual, appear to have a problem with her weight.

In fact the blasted media seem to have a problem with everybody's weight. Apparently, one must be the perfect weight because one never finds oneself in the newspapers or silly magazines in reference to this matter. But one digresses.

In an interview with 'Marie Curie' magazine Adele put the entire matter of her size to rest by saying simply  

'I don’t make music for eyes, I make music for ears.'