Sunday, 16 March 2014

Malaysian Airplane MH370 Disappearance: Not a Conspiracy

MH370 Not landing at Disused Airfield in Luzon
I'm just writing to quell the rumours and conspiracy theory that I had anything to do with that Malaysian Flying Machine MH370, that was Hijacked and then diverted to a remote airfield in the Phillipine Island of Luzon, err.. nor indeed anywhere...

Sunday, 9 March 2014

Need of a Psychologist?

A Psychologist
One has recently become aware that one's neighbours have been avoiding me and that they, in all probability can't stand the sight of me! Very strange!

One first realised this a fortnight ago when, upon entering the local pub to use the toilets the clientèle immediately exited the establishment. This has actually been happening for the last fifteen years but one has only just put two and two together.

Tuesday, 4 March 2014

Second Giraffe to Have a "J.F.K." in Denmark

Giraffe Strikes Back

Can't believe this! Not content with putting a bullet through the head of one giraffe in Copenhagen Zoo another Danish Zoo, this time, one called Jyllands Park Zoo, in Western Denmark is also going to do the same with of one of it's giraffes also called Marius. This constitutes giraffocide?

I don't know about you but if I was a giraffe called Marius living in Denmark I would pack my bags and leave pronto! So what is going on? Well the reason they want to give this second giraffe the "J.F.K." is the same as the first: EU regulations. 

Sunday, 2 March 2014

The Scandal of Homelessness and Empty Houses.

Empty Slum Property
Just been reading some statistics in the newspapers about the shame of social housing in this country. 

The statistics are shocking and I had to get my butler to explain them to me. However, in essence there are over nearly 1,000,000 empty homes in this country but at the same time approximately 1,770,116 households awaiting a place to live! It's a disgrace!