Malaysian Airplane MH370 Disappearance: Not a Conspiracy

MH370 Not landing at Disused Airfield in Luzon

I'm just writing to quell the rumours and conspiracy theory that I had anything to do with that Malaysian Flying Machine MH370, that was Hijacked and then diverted to a remote airfield in the Phillipine Island of Luzon, err.. nor indeed anywhere...


I mean for all I know it could have simply crashed on landing at that remote landing strip in the Phillipines. Err... if indeed it had done that. Not that was heading for a remote landing strip anywhere for that matter. It could easily have crashed in the sea or have been blown up but Radical Stalo-Fascistic elements of the European Union. Yes! Yes that's who did it don cha know!
I think it is a tragedy that this sort of thing happens and think of all the people involved in that terrible diversion or err crash landing, should it have crash-landed and not landed smoothly at say, off the top of my head a remote airfield somewhere in the Western Pacific Ocean or indeed simply have been blown up.

The whole thing is a tragedy that has absolutely nothing to do with me whatsoever. I even share the pain and anxiety of this incident as Lord Peter Wingate-Featherstonehaugh was on it too and was a personal friend of mine whom, irrepective of the fact that he owed me £2,000,000.45 pence, had stolen my ex-wife Greselda from me and had gone back on a deal worth millions financing a child music band called "One Direction" which could have made me millions, held the deeds to Father's estates in Fife and Lothian and had never returned my cassette of 'Grieg's Piano Concerto' has nothing to do with this plane's disappearance at all.

I mean what person would go to the lengths of diverting a plane to a small remote airfield in the Phillipine Island of Luzon nor indeed any island, assuming that the plane had been diverted that is. I mean there is just no proof linking me to this. Nor is there any proof nor evidence for that matter so the whole thing has obviously been made to look like an accident. Err.. which is exactly what it was... apparently...

So let's stop this shilly-shallying and look at the facts with a cool, calm steady deportment and realise that there is absolutely nothing connecting me with this plane diverting. Or indeed crashing nor being hijacked... because err... nobody on this Earth knows just what exactly happened to it. Not even Kevin 'The Killer' Kain, nor 'Nervous' O'Toole nor Jerry 'the Fixer' Wallace nor 'fingers' Walchevski.

No none of these people had anything to do with it's hi-jacking. If indeed it was hi-jacked. Nor did they have anything to do with it's diversion nor botched landing.

Right so that is that one all cleared up then...