Sunday, 28 June 2015

Toilet Paper Puzzler

Intellect
Take a look at this photo, I think anyone with a modicum of intellect will know what is going on here. 

Yes that's right are you an 'A' or a 'B'? Many people become very worked up over this matter so I thought it would be an excellent thing to clear it all up once and for all before rational human beings start killing each other.


Personally, I don't pay much attention to this kind of detail in my life, so long as I have a large gin and tonic, some very nice food and very nice clothes to wear I am very happy... Oh and money.... but I digress, let's concentrate on the lavatory paper. Part of the problem here is that people tend not to have much to do whilst sitting on a toilet so their minds wander and they focus on all sorts of irrelevant things at hand, the loo-roll configuration almost always becomes the victim if these mindless wanderings hence the vehemence of people's opinions of the photograph.

As you can see you are either an 'A' over-roller or a 'B' under-roller. Now Over-Rollers have the advantage of having the paper closer at hand than Under-Rollers, however the paper here has the disadvantage of being subject to breezes and consequent flapping in the wind and of course when I say wind this can mean anything in a lavatory so please be careful. Flapping paper can be most unsightly for some and act as a distraction whilst shitting, quite possibly leading to constipation! As I have indicated earlier none of this is very important and there are in fact people suffering in the world at this very moment from famine, war and other such things.
Throne

Now then'B,' the Under-Rollers! Under-Rollers have the disadvantage of the paper being slightly further away and they have to reach just that little bit more in order to grab it the paper. However, on an aesthetic lever the dangling bit of paper is flush with the wall so you will not find incidences of distractive paper flapping in wind thus leaving the toileter to have a complete distraction free shitting experience. Marvellous. 

So now then, the big questions is which are you? Please feel free to leave your preferred choice of 'A' or 'B' in the comments below and by all means leave a comment referring to why you prefer one over the other.

I prefer to remain impartial in this matter so I will refrain from stating my preference. So, to sum up are you an 'A' an Over-Roller who just needs to be a little closer to the paper for peace of mind? Or are you a 'B' an Under-Rolling, narrow minded, wind breaking fat-arsed Fascio-Stalinist back stabbing, fifth column trouble maker with what can only be described as ano-spasmodic hypo-analgesic neurological diaphorasmentatial cross-peleptic cranio-misalignmental delusions of superiority and need to be escorted immediately to the garden wall and shot.

Right so, all you have to do is leave a comment below with a forwarding address for our people to come round and give you a little present for your time and effort if you know what is good for you. No pressure.