Horse Racing Tips

Gastro-Urinary Complaint

One dabbles on the GG's every now and again so I thought it only right to start giving tips to those who want to partake in the horses too. 

So here are my tips for this week including the meeting, time, horse and odds and owner.

Carlisle:

12:40 'Gastro-Urinary Complaint'.......33/1

13:10 'Three Mile Island'....................44/1

13:45 'Bloating Haemorrhoid'................2:1

S.P.W.A. Blog: Top 10 Reviews of 2013

Year In Review

Dear readers,

over the last year my ghost writers have been busily writing my blog to tell everyone what everything in the world is really all about and to put things right here and there. 

Over the course of 2013 I received many requests from people begging me to stop this blog and to go and hang myself. I have ignored these requests as I can only assume that the grammar was not up to scratch so on occasion a ghost writer has done the decent thing and finished himself off.

Australian Predators: Nation of Innovators

Two Victims swim for their lives

One has just been reading about those clever chappies in Australia who have come up with a tip-top idea to prevent attacks by great white marine predators.

The innovative fellows there have gone round and tagged 250 of the more massive of these horrifying creatures with an electrical device that can transmit the position of these hideous man-eaters to a monitoring centre. 

Global Warming...? Global Farting!

Vanessa Feltz

Just been reading up on a theory about dinosaurs and global warming. Apparently the blighters gassed themselves all to death by billowing out billions of tons of methane.

The scientists based their theory on the methane producing capacity your common or garden cow.

Admiral Nelson Mandela: An Obituary

 Admiral Nelson Mandela

One is sad to announce the death of one of the greatest leaders of the modern age.
 
Earlier today the global statesman Admiral Half-Nelson Mandela died peacefully at his home near the coast, as he did like to be beside the seaside, beside the sea.

After defeating P.W. Bonaparte at the battle of Trafalgar Square in 1815 over the hated Poll Tax by getting him in a one-armed head lock, (the Half-Nelson), Nelson went and hid in a place called Robben Island to get some rest and relaxation for the next 185 years until 1990 or something like that.