Having just recovered from the New Year festivities at Lady Fiddlescomb-Partridges Estate. One realises that one should attempt to make some kind of effort with a new year resolution. One is not prone to this sort of wishy-washy pseudo-socialist clap-trap but one does have things that need to be addressed sooner or later so why not give it a whirl. Those Resolutions in Full;
1) The Strike, it has been about a year now and things are getting done around the estate and it's starting to look a complete shower. So my resolution is to break those perishers one way or another, never give in to bastard striking servants!
2) Money, need to make a few savings here and there so there will be more visits to the pub to use the toilets,
3) Work, need to give oneself a payrise from Ware-Armitage Motors. This is easily done by sacking a few of the numpties
4) Start writing my memoirs. This is going to be a winner entitled 'All the Filth in the World at MY Door'
5) Health, hmm yes as one gets older one needs to be aware of ones increasing frailties. Therefore I will be hiring a personal coach to run around the estate at least twice a week.
6) Relationships, this is important, one desires to be finally rid of the ex-wives, let's hope nothing too trivial happens to them this year hey ha ha.
7) Finally must have shot at least 250-260 animals last year and one feels some guilt about this, espcially what with the current attitudes towards animal welfare one should at least make an effort on this issue. So this year let's aim for at least 450. That should get the bunny-huggers in a huff
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