Friday 13 September 2013

Conflict in Syria: No Chemicals Used

Anniston: using Ware-Armitage cleaning products
Having sold weapons to both sides in the current conflict in Syria from day one of this civil war I  can safely say that no chemical weapons have been
shipped to either side from my armaments division Ware-Armitage Munitions Ltd.

No nerve agents either, nor mustard gas or anything of that ilk. There is a very good reason for this. One has principles and standards that one has to maintain in order to be taken seriously in the world of defence needs and procurement.

Once one gets a 'reputation' then one would be able to hear the bells tolling for ones arse don cha know! Not only that but both
the Syrian Government and their opposition were not able to afford the transportation costs of getting the poisons and toxins from our warehouse in Dimpton-on-Sea.

They bought everything in bulk and in cash thus getting a discount of 2% but the silly-billies neglected to factor in the transportation and storage costs. Usually one can ship stuff all around the world willy-nilly without let or hindrance but with this stuff they needed to emphasise it's use as toilet cleaning detergents.

The basic problem here was finding enough empty bottles of 'Mr Toilet' to conceal all their nerve agent in but they just couldn't do it. They needed at least one million bottles to make a successful shipment but the company who manufacture 'Mr Toilet' refuse, point blank to sell empty bottles, only full ones thus upping the costs for both the Syrian Government and the Syrian Rebels

Despite both parties to this dirty little war pleading with the manufacturer of 'Mr Toilet,' to sell empty bottles, Ware-Armitage Household Cleaning Products staunchly refuses to do such a thing on the grounds that its integrity as a provider of household cleaning detergents could be impugned if the empty bottles are used in nefarious ways. In the mean time I've got 100 tons of toxic nerve agent sitting idly at my warehouses in Dimpton-on Sea taking up valuable space and costing me a small fortune in storage. If they don't come and collect it soon then I'm going to have to dump it all in the sea! There just doesn't seem to be any trust in business these days! 

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